Thursday, January 15, 2009

Common Sense Fashion gets Catty.

Today we are taking issue with a certain affordable store and leader of the teen fashion steamroller, "Eternally 19" or something along those lines... It is a great place to pick up little tops and layering basics that look like they might be from somewhere pricier. Now we at the committee are not 19, and that being said, we are appalled at the state of youth fashion today.

#1: Your pantaloons are showing. These things are too strange for words. This outfit adds a hideous pooch. However, this would be great for a flood, after she joins the Hessian army.

#2: What is going on between her waist and dramatically lowered crotch? Where is her real crotch? That is an odd space but we can't stop looking! Oh, the mystery! This outfit is obviously inspired by Samantha Ronson, who, if you don't know is Lindsay Lohan's DJ hipster lady. She makes very dubious fashion choices and should not be a muse. The hat is too small, it makes her head look like a giant melon, while the shirts are mannish and disturbing.


#3. Ooooh, the pants. Imagine if you had a real body and tried to pull this off? Don't. We thought this trend ended in 1987, but alas, the glamour of that era has entranced the younger set. Try to find your own sweat-flinging flashdance moment in these dominatrix heels and you might break an ankle! We do nominally like the SATC inspired Manolo knockoffs, but in a very specific setting.


Next we'll bring out some lovely choices and must haves for the dolldrums we call January through March...

Signing off.

3 comments:

  1. Uh huh, yes! You have always had excellent taste in every aspect of your life!

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  2. um yeah, the middle choice...that is what happens to my tights when they get old and streched out and then i have to walk around all funny hoping that no one knows whats happening under my dress, and then when i reach a private spot i have to do that weird pull up dance. yep, wouldn't want that to be a public fashion display.

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  3. Perhaps the pantaloons might fly in the real world. I am just worried that if anyone who isn't 6 feet tall and under 100 pounds wears these pants, they might look more like diapers than high fashion.

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